Two days ago I flew US Air from Greenville to Dulles via Charlotte. It took 10 hours to get to my destination, including the time it took to drive from Asheville to Greenville. I flew out of Greenville because the fare difference was $600. Save the client money and what’s an hour drive? The drive ended up including fear of icy roads and buckets of rain. Once in Greenville US Air called and emailed the flight was delayed, causing a missed connection and arriving in DC 5 hours after the scheduled arrival.

Internally I immediately freaked, though I continued a me-to-me dialogue that all would be well. As the time ticked on, I began to worry that I would not make it at all that night and miss the next day of work which would mean losing the dollars and likely pissing off the client. I sat stressed in my seat in the waiting area at the gate for hours. And I eventually got to my destination, failing miserably at my yogi philosophy of staying centered though the storms.

Today I get another chance. I arrived at the airport with lots of time to spare and have been already given an extra half hour. Another mechanical delay. If this delay is the last one and we arrive in Charlotte at the new time, I will make my flight to Greenville. If not, I will have yet another sit at the Charlotte airport this week. The worst that could happen.

But already I can feel the tightness in my upper back, the hunger in my belly. And this concourse only has a Subway…not much I want to eat there. But I brought a banana from the hotel so that’s all good for now.

******
I wrote the thoughts above 2 days ago at Dulles and I am now home and have had a chance to reflect on the week. Definitely a growth week. All in all I did pretty well. I got home as scheduled on Thursday. Spent some quality time with a friend and family. And did a little work. And a yoga practice. Bikram yoga. Been thinking about that too.

In a few weeks, I will offer the What’s Right With Me? workshop in my hometown of Asheville, North Carolina. For the last 2 and a half years I have been offering sessions and have done several workshops asking these questions and drawing out the answers. Literally. Drawing the answers to the questions about the very core of us. I did not set out to design this question series. It sort of designed me…

The inspiration for the questions came as a result of 2 friends and I attempting to collaborate to be of service and make a living with this new career I’d stepped into as a graphic recorder or facilitator. (There are a few different names for the work that I do. In essence I capture information, thoughts, hopes, dreams in illustrations and text on a white board or paper live-time mostly – though I do illustrate maps, visions, ideas, information montages, my own thoughts and those of others.) The 3 of us came up with a few questions to clarify our individual life goals to be sure my dear friends were not simply stepping into my dream and forgetting theirs.

Amy is a mega talent in a tidy package of beauty inside and out. And she is hilarious on stage in her character roles. Amy and Ken met over 30 years ago on the road in a band where Ken played I imagine an Eric Clapton-like brilliance on a shiny guitar, while Amy kept the audience entranced with her out in front of herself soul and voice. It is easy for me to see what Amy’s give back to the world is…it was more difficult for her then before we “did the questions” for her. I often say, and I’ve heard it often said, we are the last ones to see ourselves. Or we can be, until we turn it around and look at ourselves through our own eyes of appreciation…”what’s right with me?”…our new mantra. Amy sees who she is…it’s awesome.

Some of you who have been following my crooked (not the illegal kind of crooked) pathway with Verbal Remedies, thank you, first of all. You may have been there when I was thinking nobody cared in my very dark days of fear in the transition from being suburban up and comer, to tried-to-be-hippie-like, to not knowing who or what I was, to settling down and finding that I’m a pretty cool person, living a pretty cool life. I’ve followed a bunch of different healing methods and guru-type things. What finally works is taking a good look at myself and appreciating who I am, not who I hoped to be. Being okay with my faults, because they are most definitely there. Some I am changing, some I will change, some I can change, some I don’t change.

What I find in general is that some of the very things I have tried to diminish are my greatest gifts. They help me to be who I have wished to be and always have been somewhere inside. I am aware of my current and maybe life-long mission.

These questions have changed lives. I see it in the lovely people who have allowed me to ask and record their answers in the form of a poster for them to take home and color and truly see. The playfulness of coloring in or simply tracing the lines with your eyes helps the answer to be taken to heart. Lovely image.I am always honored to be a part of it with those who have played and helped me to see the value in making it my job to offer the questions on a much larger basis.

Sue is another dear friend of mine. Sue came into my life in the midst of my chaos and I into hers. We had both recently divorced and thrown our safe and secure lives into the air, scrambling to get the pieces to come back together. She is a filmmaker…the little filmmaker who could. Sue’s motto must have been “I think I can, I think I can!” because she just kept going. When last I saw her one year ago, Sue told me her beloved movie was over and she was giving up on it. We talked alot and we “did the questions”. Within 2 weeks, she was offered 2 distribution deals and now the movie is very much alive and being distributed. She attributes looking at what’s right with her and seeing who she is to be the catalyst for allowing in the future she had been trying so hard to keep out…all the while thinking she was pulling it in. I know it is because she chose to do something with the answers she received in the process of answering simple questions. Sue’s current motto must now be “I know I can.” because she is doing it, she is moving in the direction of her dreams with big steps.

I’ve learned that any kind of control is resistance. If we hold on too tightly, we cannot access the gifts that are in the palm of our hand.

For the last month or so, I have been lucky enough to find support with a woman who is brilliant at what she does and has accepted being my biz partner. So if you can’t make it to this workshop, it looks like there will be more and more … Also I will certify people to offer the questions in their own practice of whatever kind by attending a week long workshop in, hmmm, I don’t know… Costa Rica? France? Meanwhile I hope you will check out my ebook once I get it all put together. It’s written and it is like a workshop in a book. An app that is interactive (is that redundant?) is on the way. Also, the children’s book titled “I’m Awesome” is in the early sketch stages.

I love what I do. It’s my mission.

COME TO THE WORKSHOP! (March 16th, 1:30-3:30 at Nourish & Flourish in Asheville.) It will change your life…if you let it. It is just 2 hours on an early Saturday afternoon as we step into spring. Nourish & Flourish is a lovely space, small and intimate, so space is limited. Please sign up online or comment here or email me and tell me you are coming. http://tinyurl.com/acmvj58 to sign up via paypal. I hope to see you there. I promise at the least it will be entertaining to take a journey down memory lane to childhood and walk it right up to today and what’s next. At best your life will never again be the same and you will begin to feel absolutely perfectly outfitted to be that person you hope yourself to be. And you will begin to ask “what’s right with me?” instead of the heretofore usual alternative. Start asking that question right now.

Post a sticky note, everywhere you might see it often, that asks the question: What’s right with me?

Experiment. Let me know what happens.

Our Deepest Fear
Click on the link above to view the video…I don’t seem to be able to post it any other way…not sure why…sometimes technology and I just don’t see eye to eye!

Waking up this morning to the realization that it is now February, the Hallmark designated month of love, I froze for a moment. Once again, another Valentine’s Day without a Valentine. But wait, I thought. I have many Valentines…starting with my children and grandchildren. I can make this month all about giving love instead of my usual seeking it. I’m pretty sure that I am not alone in having a deep need to express love. And I’m pretty sure I am not alone in thinking that first I have to have someone who expresses love to me so I feel safe enough to express back. A whole bunch of us wait around until it is safe enough to express love…get the picture? Somebody has to go first! So…here I go, here we go. Let’s get out there this month and BE LOVE! Come back here and let us all know what happens as a result.

Nearly 2 decades ago…not really sure of the time frame…I made a decision to “practice positive”, switch around how I focused on things, situations and people around me. My well-entrenched habit was to look at things as though the bottom was about to fall out of any situation, if it hadn’t already. What I know now is that a shift in what I focus on in any given situation determines how I move through it and how it it affects those around me.

This weekend I made the decision to euthanize my little, wacky, beloved Shih Tzu, Chloe. “Put her to sleep” is more preferred as it portrays a loving kindness that was inherently wished for in taking the action.

My dear friend Amos stood through it with me. She helped me to stay grounded. Just by her presence as she freely and lovingly fed back to me my open thoughts. Guiding me to a stronger self.

The circle of fine women who gathered. Divinely given.

The support team at the vet hospital. Beautiful.

And Chloe. Brave Chloe. Strong Chloe. Loving Chloe. Feisty Chloe. Insistent Chloe. She kept us captive of a bit of tension in her later years. Still she delighted with her latest toy, the green alligator. Molly hasn’t touched it since Chloe has been gone. Molly is sad. She is my big briard that Chloe bullied. A site to see with the two of them playing tug of war inches from each others face. Chloe was a daredevil. Or she simply didn’t let size be a unit of measure of worth to her.

I pray she is at peace with my decision, that she is happy about it. That she is free of pain. That she knows she is loved and missed. That she is playing with Luci. Chloe and Luci. Namaste.

I have been traveling quite a bit in the last 6 months, working with consulting groups who support companies to have meetings that are focused on humanity rather than the profits they hope to gain as a result. I think that is okay. It is a fine switch in mentality and definitely on the road to healing what ails corporate America. People seeing people. After all, corporations are made up of people. Without people is there a corporation?

So all this traveling puts me out of touch with a consistent social network at home and my socializing seems to be primarily the teams I work with and a few really great friends I mostly hang out with via cell phone. One of those friends is my sister. We are having a renewed relationship as we both seem to be needing the other for a landing place in the rough seas. It is really nice to have her and the other women I talk with, of varying ages. My children are also a big part of my life, all grown up and growing families of their own. In fact we just added the newest family member last Saturday with the birth of my daughter’s daughter. Holding her today was a little slice of heaven and a big dose of what is real and important.

I am hoping that with my latest technological purchase of my iPad and downloading wordpress app that I will write more frequently and share what I hope is Interesting and inspiring. That remains to be seen.

Tomorrow I will talk to a group of artists, entrepreneurial creatives who have come to a free workshop about the legal side of their business of selling their art. What I bet is that these are people who are determined to make their world happen as they have envisioned. Though I am not sure of what I will say exactly, I am sure that my intent is for as many people as possible walking away with a renewed sense of appreciation for themselves. And a knowing that they are part of the change of this world, looking to organic beauty, looking to peace, looking to love.

I am excited because this is what I have planned to be my future, offering conversation with an audience, encouraging those people to be who they are because it is so much more than enough to make a difference in this world. I experimented with this last year when I thought I might be dying. I had no medical reason to think so, it was just a fear because my father died at my age most likely. Well I made it to this next birthday a couple weeks ago and, as life would have it, it seems rather than ending my life is just beginning once again. Perhaps that is what I sensed was dying, that person I had been being because I was afraid to be me.

And now, now that I am allowing myself to see myself, all kinds of wonderful things are showing up. Things that I had been trying so hard to  make happen are flowing more easily into my world. I am most grateful for all that I have and am getting pretty demanding that a couple that are outstanding find their way in. One is more wonderful work and the other is a romance…pretty standard fare. Match.com and eHarmony are not the answer. Are you possibly reading this? Dare to dream

A Hope Elder Speaks

“You have been telling the people that this is the Hour. And there are things to be considered…

Where are you living?

What are you doing?

What are your relationships?

Are you in right relation?

Where is your water?

Know your garden.

It is time to speak your Truth.

Create your community.

Be good to each other.

And do not look outside yourself for the leader.”

Then he clasped his hands together, smiled, and said, “This could be a good time!”

“There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold on to the shore. They will feel they are torn apart and will suffer greatly.

“Know the river has its destination. The elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open, and our heads above water. And I say, see who is in there with you and celebrate. At this time in history, we are to take nothing personally, least of all ourselves. For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey comes to a halt.

“The time for the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves! Banish the word struggle from your attitude and your vocabulary. All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration.

“We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.” –attributed to an unnamed Hopi Elder, Oraibi, Arizona

It’s been over a month since I wrote here last. Skipping through all that has happened, I land here today with a new household full of people I love. My son, his wife, 2 year old baby girl and their Golden Retriever have moved to Asheville and are staying with me until they find a place of their own. It reminds me of the story of the man (let’s call him KuKu) who goes to his guru for advice…

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I just watched this feature story on CNN.com touting yoga. It’s a beautifully powerful story. http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2010/04/21/dnt.mans.yoga.weight.loss.plan.WXYZ?hpt=T2

I ended the previous post with gratitude, claiming a new story is emerging. So what’s the story? A very Brooklyn-like accent punctuates this question. Humor, y’know. Humor is a respite from a world that has seemingly gone mad. I’ve just read through the headlines once again on cnn.com. Oye. Don’t want to go there this morning. Humor. It’s a way of looking at the world with a smile that comes from the head and lands in the heart. A purposeful thought of twisting a situation into a laugh.

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