Does anyone see that this is a most drastic measure of losing what we have left of our independence, our freedom? It is calling us to take to the streets with fierce grace in peace, letting the powers that be know we are mad as hell and we’re not gonna take it anymore. Freedom is our inherent right. Our country was founded on the principle. As we continue to languish in our fear and media stupor, what is the message we are sending to our forefathers and mothers? Do we not look to them as heroes and heroines for having the courage to fight for this freedom? And so we must continue the legacy and be heroes and heroines today. We must take back freedom. Demand it. Encourage this government to come back to the originating intent of the people, by the people and for the people.

Earlier this evening I realized that I had not yet written here today. I had completely forgotten as I got into my day. I’ve been developing the habit of writing first thing in the morning after meditating and a yoga practice. This morning I got caught up in reading stories of joy and sadness about Haiti. I feel compelled to read and to know, as deeply as the distance and media allow, what is happening in a country not so far from our United States of America. One of the stories I read had to do with how the city of Port au Prince came to be so heavily populated . It seems our government had something to do with it, making some kind of deal with an earlier leader of Haiti to create a sort of personal “Taiwan”. I’d like to be more able to intelligently discuss this but I don’t seem to retain the facts as much as the feeling I had reading about the involvement of the US government…our elected leaders of the people, by the people and for the people. This came on the morning after watching Michael Moore’s movie Sicko about the state of healthcare in our country. As I get ready to make my Blue Cross Blue Shield health insurance payment, I wonder if I am throwing away hard earned money with a mistaken belief that, should I need it, I will have the medical help I am paying for. This movie suggests I might be.

Hmmm. I have to wonder what to do with this information. What can I do, one person? And then tonight I listened to a teleconference with Marianne Williamson. Marianne is one fireball of a woman. Petite, beautiful, smart, articulate and powerful. Though very loving, she will hardy let anyone sit in the place of victim. She has put together a conference called Sister Giant in Los Angeles at the end of February, inviting women to come and be a part of a movement to change this world. Creating a force to be reckoned with, Marianne imagines a conversation in the White House. “Mr. President, I don’t think the women will let you slide on providing healthcare to every single American. You had best do something about it and do it now.” I’m paraphrasing but you get the point. I hope to be at that conference, though I am not waiting until then to become part of this force of women who are awake to their responsibilities to take care of the issues at hand and bringing the men along with us.

So, if you’re with me on this, how about doing a little exploring of your own? Rent a couple of movies: Food, Inc. and Sicko. Read “What You’re Not Hearing About Haiti”. Form your own opinion rather than me giving you one. If there is any truth to any of it for you, commit to opening to doing something about it. I know that it might seem large and unwieldy, that one person can hardly do anything about the problems depicted. However, begin to have conversations with friends about it, instead of less imminently important things. Marianne quoted Martin Luther King as follows:

“Your life begins to end when you become silent about the things that matter most.”

Your life begins to end when you become silent about the things that matter most.

Like probably most Americans and others around the world, I am watching news of Haiti, viewing images of the destruction, filling up with joyful emotion when I read of the miracle of someone buried in the rubble for days and rescued. The horror of finding yourself wedged between two walls in the dark, unsure of whether you will ever see light again, breath and move freely again, see loved ones again, experience life in all its wonder again is a fate I do not wish to imagine and I am. Enough that I am moved to prayer for those who have endured this and may still be enduring this.

I experience overwhelming panic when I find myself physically stuck, as in when my fingers swell and I am unable to easily pull my rings off, or when my children or grandchildren playfully pin me down or in a corner. A fear rises up so great that I have the sense that I need to use my force to get out of that situation. How would it be to not have the option of being able to remove yourself from that physical stuck place? I am most grateful I do not have that experience. And I am feeling the metaphor for those places in my world where I have (and I’ll use no punishing judgmental adjective to pin on myself for being so, though I’m inclined to) called God unfair for keeping me in a situation such as loneliness or fear or whatever kind of emotion I am not happy to be experiencing. I have learned to breathe through it and find the peace in those uncomfortable places, relaxing into them, finding the blessings that go along with them. Practicing yoga has taught me that. I have learned to let go of the resistance and breathe into the stuck places. In doing so I have found freedom, a spiritual freedom that translates into physical and emotional freedom.

Where are you feeling stuck? May I suggest allowing yourself to really feel it and breathe into it, and then let go bit by bit, fingernail by fingernail, relaxing just a little more with each breath. Appreciating the sense that all is truly well because you are aware and experiencing life.

This is the third week of January 2010. It’s Martin Luther King day. “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort but where he stands at times of challenge and discovery.” I read Martin Luther King’s quote and I wonder where it is I am standing.

Yesterday a friend sent me a link to a movie posted on YouTube, Farewell to the Republic. I watched 10 minutes of it and stopped it, no longer able to listen to people talking about the manipulation of the world by corporations who own it essentially. It felt too big to handle and seemed to render my own passion useless in a world that may not exist as we know it now very soon. Instead of following a passion, shouldn’t we be figuring out how to best take care of ourselves in a society described as falling apart?

My answer is to keep our heads into the winds of fear. Let them blow past and thru and eventually die down.  Stay with the rhythm, keep moving. Continue taking the steps committed to take thru this day and this week. Trusting and following the calling, allowing it to unfold as it will, paying attention to what shows up and adjusting accordingly.

As I sat down to my computer this morning to write, I first went to a news site to see how it is going in Haiti. I watched a few videos with graphic content warnings at the beginning and sat afterward with tears streaming down my face. I left my computer, unable to write, and went to make breakfast. I sat before my food expressing gratitude for the meal, the shelter, the safety of my life and it occurred to me that this is one of those moments in time that is crying out for help. Haiti is far away, easy to turn off the news of the devastation. Most of us do not have any connection to Haiti and yet…we are never far apart. We are all connected and here to help each other. The more fortunate of us have an obligation to do whatever we can to be of assistance. And pretty much anybody who is reading this is infinitely more fortunate than the people of Haiti on a good day there. So what can we do? Send money through the Red Cross or the Clinton foundation. It’s easy. Pull out your debit card and send a little more than you think you can. http://www.clintonfoundation.org/haitirelief. And then go about your day because you can and be grateful.

Michael and I sat chatting about how many things are in our lives right now. So many blessings that feel much like the life we each have been dreaming of. One where we play vital roles in creating a better place. I keep hearing “Heal the world, make it a better place…” Michael Jackson must be whispering in the cold wind. So there we were remarking about how much there is to carry right now and I had a quick vision of crossing a bridge loaded down with bags, heading to the other side so far across the ravine. My bridge is a very strong steel suspension bridge. There is enough bend to give it room to flow with the movements of the earth and its winds. Kind of like softening the knees in a standing yoga posture.

As we move across the bridge our bags lessen one by one. Someone comes by and asks to help carry one, another is in need of a blanket we carry, another the pillow. Another a book we cherish is the perfect gift for someone having a difficult crossing. By the time we reach the other side, we have let go of those bags we started out with, only keeping that which has energy of its own that is specific to our nuturing. And we are here.

I’m reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s new book, Committed. I’m enjoying her writing style and getting into the story. This book is not the same as Eat, Pray, Love. It appears to be another layer of Elizabeth’s journey. She inspires me to write my story, which I do already do and have been doing. In bits and pieces. Nothing continuous except the sweet little book I wrote and illustrated, Dare to Dream, 10 years ago. Just yesterday, I listened with moist eyes and a bright light in my heart as a dear friend described what that book means to her. I suppose I should elicit a testimonial because I would so love it if more people read it and were inspired by it and maybe Amy’s comments would entice.

When the publisher remaindered the book, I bought and then literally let 7000 of those books go down the drain. I was so afraid of myself that I left them in boxes at a friend’s warehouse for a couple years before stepping into responsibility to do something with them 4 days before it was too late. All of those books were destroyed by the flood of 2005 here in Asheville just as I was striking a deal with Borders in Arizona. I had one box of books with me in Phoenix and they quickly became a treasure, given out with great awareness to people who have come into my life since then. I may have 10 more hard copies, though thanks to my brother and his company http://booksonboard.com it is in ebook form on his site. He’s made it very affordable at $5.99. And you can share the pdf with your friends. Click on the book image to buy it. I’m making a sales pitch. Oye.

So what am I saying here? Opportunity is here right now. Believe in yourself. Take the chance. If you dawdle around, the opportunity will move on and you’ll be left with recreating it another time. The passion you used to create this opportunity will simply retreat into a corner until it is sparked again. It doesn’t die. It lives on because it is in your soul, it’s part of the basic you. And I truly believe it is part of the basic us. All this cannot be about satisfying ourselves, feeding the ego. That becomes a hollow quest. I urge you and me to be who we are so that we play our role in the world, whether it be Mother Theresa-esque or the kind person behind the counter. We’ve got to connect the dots and give this world back its soul. If your dot isn’t there, we don’t have the whole picture.

This weekend was my granddaughter’s birthday. Elliot turned 2 in all her glory. She greeted me at the door in her leotard, tutu, glittery shoes and a smile that lights up my world. “GiGi!” A sound I love that comes up from a squeal. To be loved by a child is the most pure love of all. The purest love I have experienced. I remember when my youngest daughter was in the kitchen and as I rounded the corner from turning up “Baby Love” on the stereo (life before ipods) singing and dancing, Taylre erupted with “I love you, Mom!” My heart soared as I experienced the purity of her exclamation that came from what seemed like heaven. Feeling Elliot’s arms wrapped around my chest, patting my back with her still chubby little hands is heaven.The power of one tiny little baby…

When it came time for the “2” candle to be lit on the ring of cupcakes set in front of her, all of us, children and adults, surrounding her and singing the happy birthday song, Elliot took it all in with great appreciation. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen anyone take it in as she did. Two years old, sitting patiently, her face shining with the light of the candle, smiling and looking around at those of us singing to her and in awe. It was clear she was drinking it in in a way that I have rarely seen and so happy I did.

She is my argument for myself that there is such thing as reincarnation. Elliot just seems to know things without being taught. She is so very wise for someone so very little. It appears she has come into the world prepackaged and ready to go as she grows into herself. She makes it so very clear that our job is to guide the children and love the children, keeping them healthy and safe until they can do it themselves.

As I sat in quiet before writing, sipping my tea, thinking what to write about this morning, my thoughts went to the things that I hadn’t accomplished through the week that I’d hoped to. It felt hard to believe it is already Friday. When my father died at the very young and close to my own age of 57, he left me with the message that life was just as long as the snap of the fingers. And so this week is what fraction of that. So fast! The feeling that I have as I think those thoughts is a sinking feeling. One that moves me literally and physically into a retreat. Quick switch. That is not how I want to start the day, nor how I want you to. What did I accomplish this week? What are the blessings of the week…which by the way there is still a whole day out in front.

For one huge blessing, I have stayed warm. We’re in a very cold weather pattern right now. The whole of the country is in temperatures that are well below freezing. There is a light snow on the ground. And while there are reports of homeless people freezing to death, I have oil in the tank, electricity to run the furnace and blow warm air throughout my home. I have wood for the woodstove to use less of the oil. I have food, water, a warm shower. I am well.

All of that is plenty and then there are the people in my life who have shown up through the week. I spent a couple hours with my daughter and my 2-year-old tomorrow granddaughter. Highlight of my week. I met with a new friend who shares my passion of inspiring people through joyful expression. I’ve received an invitation from an old friend to spend some time together. I joined with a group of soul sisters to celebrate the birthday of a woman we all love so much. I was given the gift of someone who helped me to say no and take better care of myself. There’s more.

What are the blessings of your week? What are the things that showed up for you that you were not expecting? Count those blessings and take a deep breath and smile “thank you”. Now move into your day with a smile on your face and in your heart. Thank you for reading.

Sometimes you just have to say no and this morning I did just that. Someone entered my life and wanted to take more than I was willing to give. True to an old pattern, I adjusted my way of thinking to accommodate this person. The situation began to take over my life so much so that I awoke at 4 this morning unable to shake the thoughts of it. I wondered what I wasn’t looking at that needed attention so I could let go. So into the shadow I went and found that, just as I believed this person was using me to get out of a situation, I was using this person to get out of one of my own. She didn’t want to take responsibility to pay money for a place to live and I didn’t want to take responsibility to pay money to have my dogs taken care of. That kind of situation can work, a clear barter. I don’t know her side of it, I only know my own and I ignored big red flags trying to make the arrangement work. Everything in my body said no while my mind said “make it work”. There were so many flags, so many opportunities to say no and I kept holding on wishing to make it different. It couldn’t be different because it was what it was. Sometimes you just have to say no.